Theo: You’re listening to K-SUN FM, radio for the people. And it is a gorgeous Friday here in Sunrise Beach. I’m your host….what, may I ask, are you looking at?
Daria: Me? Nothing. Nothing at all. Just sharing the airwaves with my favorite coworker. The one who never annoys me by being a smug jerk with a stick up his —
Theo: Oh, yes please, do entertain our listeners with your creative insults, Daria. It will only make people respect our new show more.
Daria: I think the listeners like it. I think the listeners agree with me that you, Dr. Theodore Chadwick, need to loosen up a little. Have some fun. Go wild. When was the last time you got laid?
Theo: None of your business. And that’s also not the only way a person can go wild. Long walks on the beach. A candle-lit dinner just for two. A romantic ride on the —
Daria *muttering*: You are so fucking boring it’s insufferable.
Theo: The fact that you find romantic gestures to be ‘boring’ and ‘insufferable’ shows me that whoever risked your wrath in the past to bring you a bouquet of flowers was doing it all wrong. Maybe you just need someone to do it right.
Daria: Oh, and that person would be you, I’m guessing?
Theo *smirks*: Please, Daria, I spend way too many hours of my life with you in this damn sound booth. Taking you on a date is my idea of a waking nightmare, yet I’m wondering why you’d jump to that conclusion. You weren’t…asking me on a date, were you?
Daria: Is the sky purple? Have frogs started falling from clouds? Has a portal from Hell suddenly opened up and —
Theo: Why I thought I could ask a simple…listen, just tell them why we’re here? Please?
Daria:…our book comes out in seven days. Friday, May 20th. Be there or, uh…miss out on whatever shitshow is happening between me and the good doctor over there, currently gripping his microphone like he’s about to break it in half.
Theo: You are….very frustrating to me. As you, the listeners, our entire staff and all of Sunrise Beach is aware of now.
Daria: Such a gentleman. Oh, look, here come the frogs now.